Promote your Presence (at an event)

Attending a polyamory-specific conference, seminar, or workshop is a great way to get your name out.   In addition to doing whatever you would normally doing at the gathering, you have the chance to meet a lot of awesome people from different locations and walks of life.  Some thoughtful preparation will help you be better able to promote your new-found poly presence. Today I will guide you through how to prepare for your first networking event

2 weeks before the event

Get online - People are starting to talk about the event at this point.  Hopefully by this time someone has posted the event on Facebook and is using some variance of the event title as a hashtag (when you put a # before the word) on Twitter.  Start updating your status with comments about the event - just don't over do it.  I'd keep it to 1-2x a day, and mix it up with updates on other aspects of your life. Get business cards - A well designed business card can leave a lasting impression long after the event is over.  What makes a good business card? You want something that reflects the personal presence that you are trying to promote. Do you want people to see you as approachable? fancy? utilitarian? practical?  Choose (or create) a card design that practically screams that image. There are many examples of good business card designs. When you take a look at the cards, don't limit yourself to simply thinking "oh, that's pretty!".  What type of business is the card advertising?  What impressions do you have about that business based on simply viewing the card?As for a place to create and buy your business cards - I recommend VistaPrint. It's an easy to use site that allows you to either go with a good-looking template that they created, or to create your own that better matches your style.  They also have free business cards (if you're ok with the small bit of advertising on the back). If you want to go green, there are many digital business card options out there. Get your travel plans squared away - Doing this now means less stress later.  For those that are reading this - I'm posting this article 2 weeks before the Poly Living Conference & Poly Leadership Summit. This means that I'm reminding you to register, book your hotel room, and book your flight before it's too late (and you start to stress out).  If you need to give your boss advanced notice on time-off, do this as well. Begin drafting your "elevator speech" - People are going to ask you who you are and what you do or what you're looking for. You need to be able to answer these questions in a way that grabs their attention. One way of doing this is to start with asking a rhetorical question around a common problem, and then describing what you do as a solution to said problem. Example: You know how some poly organizers struggle to get stuff done?... (you will probably get a nod of affirmation)... What I do is I run a site that provides them with the resources and tools  that they need build and strengthen their community, as well as the option to hire me to receive personalized support. Do you see what I did there? Do you think that the description that I gave is more memorable than saying "I'm a writer and a personal coach"? Take steps to minimize stress - if you have any projects or tasks with deadlines prior to the event, get them done right away. Do not procrastinate.  Try to increase your sleep by a half hour (unless you're already at 8+ hours of sleep).  Drink more water so that your body can flush out toxins. Take time for yourself. Starting these steps now can help to reduce the risk of stress-induced illnesses.

1 week before the event

Take care of your body - You are probably feeling both excited and stressed about the upcoming event.  Do what you can to boost your immune system before the event.  Sleep, nutrition, and hydration are very important during this time period.  The last thing you need is to get sick because you are pushing your body too hard. Take care of your hair - Go to a barber and get rid of any split ends that you may have. You don't need to pay $$$ to a professional stylist, but you do need to show attention to grooming detail! :)  If you dye your hair and have let your roots grow out (and it's not part of an intentional expression of fashion), get that box of hair dye and do a touch-up!

3 days before the event

Choose what you will wear - When you meet someone, they form a first impression of you within a tenth of a second.  The only exposure that they have of you during that time is your appearance (and maybe your scent, but we'll get to that later).  What you wear plays a role in how others perceive you.  This does not mean that you need to be a fashion guru or buy new clothes. However, you do need to be mindful of the message you are sending through your wardrobe. If you want to dress to impress, the first step is to find out what the dress code is for the event, and either dress at that level or the one above.  Some conferences will explicitly say if you should dress casual, business casual, formal, etc.  If you're not sure, go business casual (non-jean pants and a nice shirt).  You can also dress to impress in casual clothes (jeans + trendy shirt + clean, new'ish shoes). Double check your travel arrangements - This includes the route to the train/bus/airport that you that you are taking to the event.  The purpose is to minimize surprises (and stress). Print out maps if you need to. Do preliminary packing - Get the luggage out of your storage area and start packing the things that you will need for the trip, but don't need during the next few days (like the business cards you just bought). Put together a checklist of what you still need to pack so that you can keep track of this as you go.

1 day before the event

Set up TwitPic - if you are using a phone with a camera and have a Twitter account. TwitPic uploads photos to your Twitter feed if they are sent through an email address (which they will provide for your account). Guess what - most camera phones allow you to picture-text to an email address. Set up your TwitPic address within your cell phone's contact book. Do a dry run to make sure everything works correctly. Verify travel arrangements one more time - If you are flying, you can check-in for your flight within 24 hours of departure. If you can, print out everything you need (boarding pass, directions to/from hotel, phone list, etc.) and store them in a folder in your carry-on. Finish packing - remember the checklist you put together? Read through it one more time and add additional items that you may have missed. Now, start packing, and check off items as you pack them. This way, you aren't rushing around the house looking for your swimsuit when it is already in your suitcase, under a pile of socks. Pack healthy snacks in your luggage - In the event that there are going to be long breaks between meals (more than 4-5 hours), you need something to keep your blood sugar from dropping too low (which may make you unfocused, cranky, disengaged, etc.) . Look for convenient snacks that have a low glycemic index. They can help curb your hunger between meals without putting you through spikes and crashes in your blood sugar. Get a good night's sleep - Skip the caffiene if you can. Drink a lot of water (and herbal tea) to hydrate your body. A half hour before bed, stop being active (this includes heavy thinking). Take a warm shower. Drink some hot cocoa. Relax. Tomorrow is going to be crazy enough. You don't need to go through it sleep-deprived.

During the event

Eat - Breakfast. Lunch. Dinner. Snacks. This will keep you awake and focused. Drink - Water, lots of it. Stay hydrated. This will also keep you awake and focused. Be in the moment - meet people. Be engaged. Turn off the cell phone if you need to. You can do Twitter updates during your downtimes. Get contact information - Put the ball in your court on following-up with people. If you find someone that you want to stay in touch with after the event is over, get their info, and send them an email 1-3 days after the event to follow-up.

A Special Note on Business Cards

A business card serves two purposes. The primary purpose is to provide your contact information to someone so that they can contact you later at their leisure. It is a reminder of who you are, what you do, and how to get ahold of you. The secondary purpose of your business card is advertising.  A good business card not only enhances your first impression, but it creates a lasting impression. Remember that last part - advertising is the secondary purpose of a business card. I’ve often seen people give away their business cards to as many people as possible and call that “networking”. The more appropriate term for what they are doing is spamming.  Most of those cards end up in the trash. I know - I've tossed out quite a few business cards from spammers.  You need to show that you are memorable and can provide value first, then people will find value in keeping your contact information handy. Next time, we will discuss how to build your poly presence online.